An Excerpt from 

Mary Magdalene Beckons: Join the River of Love

by Mercedes Kirkel 

Message from Mary Magdalene:

Beloved ~

Yes, I want to talk to you about the dark night of the soul. This is a very mysterious concept to many of you. Most of you have a place within you that you’re afraid of going, something that brings up too much pain. The dark night of the soul is about facing your fear and pain and going into it rather than avoiding it.

What happens when you do that? It is not what you fear. There is an initial period in which you feel your fear, feel your pain, whatever it is. There is often a feeling of expansion with this, since you usually have shrunk back or contracted away from the pain or fear. There is a sense of relaxing and opening as your feeling nature expands into your whole experience. At some point, often sooner than you would expect, a shift happens. At that point, your experience changes to one of trust and peace, perhaps a sense of being carried—as in carried by a river rather than fighting against the current.

What has happened is that you have connected with the beings of light that are there to support you, to carry you. The pain may or may not go away, but your experience of it is different because you are in the light. The light is stronger—and you are more attracted to it—than your pain. You have entered the River of Light, and it is now cleansing and guiding you.

Your job as humans is to stay in this River of Light. That is your true heart’s refuge and calling. It doesn’t take you away from life. It takes you into true life. This is the river that truly quenches our thirst.

All people eventually, sooner or later, come to the dark night of the soul. There may be more than one dark night, depending on the person’s design for their lifetime, the depth to which they let themselves go into their pain or fear, and the depth with which they connect with the River of Light. All connections with the River of Light are divine gifts that move us further in our path of growing in love and light.

With all my blessings,

I AM Mary Magdalene

Commentary from Mercedes Kirkel:

Mary’s discussion of the dark night of the soul continues her instructions from the previous transmission about turning to God when we’re in pain and asking for God’s help. Now, she gives us an actual step-by-step practice for how to connect with God through fully experiencing our fear and pain.

Mary acknowledges that the dark night of the soul is a mysterious concept for many people. She explains that most of us have a place within our being—some part of ourselves—that we don’t want to experience because it brings up too much pain. The dark night of the soul is about facing our fear and pain, about going into it rather than avoiding it. Most of us are afraid to open to our pain because we imagine doing so will invite in too much suffering. We may picture ourselves sinking in a quicksand of agony, possibly becoming so overwhelmed that we die of pain. These deep-seated fears activate our instinct for survival. But in reality, when we go into our pain, something very different occurs.

Mary tells us there’s an initial period of simply feeling the pain, which includes feeling the fear associated with it. And so we feel both our fear and our pain. As we continue opening to our feelings, we’ll experience a sense of expansion, a sense of relaxing and opening.  Where before, out of fear, we contracted or shrank away from the pain, now the contraction begins to unwind and release as it is replaced by expansion, relaxation, and openness. We experience our feeling nature as it extends again into our whole being.

At some point in this process, we undergo a shift as we feel lifted out of our distress. Mary points out that this release often occurs sooner than we expect, countering our tendency to assume that we’re going to be stuck in misery without end. Even if the conviction that we will never get beyond the pain does arise, we can boost our faith by remembering that this state is temporary and absolutely will change. I have consistently found that the process works exactly as Mary describes. Even so, during the early stage of opening, I still notice my deep-seated belief that I’ll get lost in my anguish and be overwhelmed by suffering. This is why I find it invaluable to be aware that an integral part of the dark night of the soul is my initial assumption that my pain will last forever. Now, when that thought arises, I see it as a sign that the process is under way, and I continue to open, knowing that a shift will occur.

What is this shift? Mary describes it perfectly as a shift to trust and peace, perhaps a sense of being carried—as by a river—rather than fighting against the current. I find this description affects me viscerally. I can tangibly feel the transition from a somatic state of fear and contraction to one of trust and peace. I notice that my belly relaxes and my breathing drops lower in my body. My state of growing relaxation is deepened by the image of relaxing my fight against the current and allowing myself to be carried by the river. I feel a sense of lightness and ease, along with the experience of trust and peace.

Mary explains what has occurred: we have connected with beings of light who are literally supporting and carrying us. She calls this entering the River of Light, an experience that cleanses us of our fear and guides us. While the pain may or may not go away, we are changed because we are in the light, and the light is stronger than the darkness of our pain. As we are drawn to experience the light, our pain will inevitably recede, if not go away altogether.

I picture the original pain and accompanying fear as a pitch-black cave. The cave represents the dark night of the soul. When we choose to open to pain, we choose to enter into the shadows of the cavity. Stepping inside, we allow our consciousness to expand to the cavern’s full dimensions. We feel its cool, moist surfaces. We may still fear that the darkness and the unknown will overwhelm us, yet another part of us whispers that opening to the cave is the best option and urges us to trust the process. We begin to have a sense of letting go and relaxation as we release our resistance to experiencing whatever exists here. At a certain point, we’re drawn to the other side of the cave, which opens into a River of Light. We give ourselves to the river, experiencing a great depth of trust and peace. As we let ourselves be carried by the beings of light that form this river, we’re cleansed and guided to where we need to be. Our pain becomes more distant as the light of the river replaces the darkness of our fear.

The process Mary describes reminds me of Elisabeth Kübler- Ross’s model of the stages of grief that people experience in coming to terms with death. These stages—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—seem similar to Mary’s description of the first part of the dark night of the soul, where we expand into the cave of our fears and eventually come to acceptance. Mary’s elucidation of opening to the light reminds me of accounts of people at the edge of death who have seen angels or various manifestations of light and experienced great bliss and peace. Mary suggests that we can have these experiences not only at death, but during life as well.

In fact, Mary tells us that the River of Light takes us into “true life” and that our job as humans is to stay in the river. She’s not just talking about an isolated, one-time event. The River of Light is a state we can continue to experience. In so doing, she tells us, we realize our true heart’s refuge and calling, which “truly quenches our thirst.”

Just hearing Mary’s description stokes my longing for union with this river and for the place in my heart to which it connects me. I feel the trust and peace the river carries us to. It’s a place I know in my soul, and yet the path there still surprises me: that surrendering into pain leads to such beauty. I’m heartened by the awareness that each time I engage this process of letting go into pain, I’m strengthened in my ability to stay connected to the River of Light. Residing in this river has become my spiritual path.

I believe that opening fully into any moment will take us to the River of Light and the heart’s refuge. And yet, pain is a particular gift for supporting us to merge with our experience. It’s like an alarm that keeps going off to remind us that something’s not right. If we heed the warning, pain provides a unique form of help, guiding us all the way through to our very depths and beyond. However, our painful places are also the ones that most of us tend to avoid. Mary points to our avoidance of pain as the biggest stumbling block to uniting with God. I think that’s why she’s so insistent about focusing on pain in her communications. She sees we need it. Merging fully with our experience, to the point of total unity or oneness, is the way through to our next step in spiritual evolution. And because it’s a process of surrender, it’s a particularly Feminine path she’s bringing forth—for both men and women.

Mary makes it clear that, sooner or later, everyone will experience at least one dark night of the soul. She urges us to recognize it as a doorway and make good use of it. As her final words affirm, “All connections with the River of Light are divine gifts that move us further in our path of growing in love and light.”

OPENING TO PAIN

1. Notice you’re in pain.

2. Choose to fully experience and open to the pain.

3. Merge with the pain by relaxing and expanding into it.

4. Allow the pain to take you to Source (inner divine qualities).

5. Experience the shift into peace as you begin to flow with the River of Light.

6. Rest in connection to God.

7. Let God direct your actions.